Does it really matter if you have to drink your coffee from a paper cup?
Not at all to me !
But Yes it’s a deal breaker for my husband, many years ago anyhow.
I had spent plenty of outings complaining about why we couldn’t just get takeaway and wander around with our coffee like ‘normal’ people.
HE couldn’t do it. He wouldn’t do it.
It spoils the taste.
It’s too cold.
And a fairly decent collection of other reasons which fortunately I forget.
My complaining wasn’t working. My manipulation and sulking only served to drive the paper cup wedge deeper. Such a big problem all over coffee in paper cups?
I devised a brilliant plan and started carrying ceramic cups in the car, my handbag and if I forgot I would buy one from a discount shop. And that seemed to be working. I still thought his take on it was immature and selfish but my gesture bought peace.
He felt valued.
He felt heard.
And for a few extra grams in my bag, I felt I got what I wanted.
To wander together with coffee.
We can so often get stuck on the ME in small things. To me drinking coffee from paper cups is nothing. To him it is important. And I need to realise that if it’s important to him, it needs to be important to me, no matter how ridiculous I may think it is. And while I am stuck on ME , I actually think I don’t have any annoying idiosyncrasies or habits.
How blindsided I really am.
You may think I will never be doing that, carrying ceramic cups or the like – but we have to be open to hear, loving well and valuing relationship over our opinions.
I will reap what I sow. For years I sowed ceramic cups in love, and today I reap as we both drink coffee in paper cups, arms in arm, wandering through shops and markets like ‘normal people’.
And put into all perspective, he is such a good guy, it was such a small thing. He LOVES his coffee in a ‘real’ cup – good on him. I will celebrate that !! I will sit in coffee shops. I will carry ceramic cups if need be. And he will wander with paper cups. It has come full circle and was well worth my pride !!
Love well – even when difficult.
The Exchange is real xo